Why does it have to hurt so much?

I love him for real. but he doesn't let me do a thing. like the other day he saw my facebook profile n picked a fight cos i had so many pictures there. N then he opened my facebook account and saw i was talking to some random guy n he got pissed off. may b i made a mistake but he is turning it al on me. he says i dont love him and i dont care enuf..... its just that im so confused about wat to do with my life and it hurts so much to be in the dark. i dunno wat happened to me al these days, dunno if i did the right thing or made a mistake,,,,, i dunno wats happening to me right no and i dunno wat wil happen to me in the future. i'm in the dark. literally.

See he lives with a girl and has two kids with her and he never tells me wat he is upto n when i ask him he asks me to stop nagging him. N im so hurt and confused about this whole relationship i try to do things that will help me take my mind off what im actually goin thru. he gets angry for every single thing i do but when i get angry he tells me to leave him alone. he does not understand. i'm only 19 after all and i want to do things on my own and learn from my mistakes. i dont want someone controlling my life all the tym.... i only want him to support me and be with me always. i don kno how to tell him this cos i kno he'l b hurt. he'l say i made him feel like he has no ryts over me. if i tel him something he neva listens... he somehow ends up discerning something totally random and unconnected....
Where is my space?? i feel so suffocated. like yesterday, i was talking to my friend to clarify a few doubts cos we had our french exam today. he was talkin ty me n i told him i was goin to talk to my friend and everything and he told me he'l cal me back in 5 mins..... so i waited.... n waited.... he din cal so i cald up my friend to discuss my french lessons cos i din want to hold her up. he cald way later and i cald him bac as soon as i was done with talking to her. he din pick up. he cald in the morning and he was furios. he wudn even listen to what i had to say....... wat do i do

i do everything to make this relationship work and he does not understand... God i never knew i cud love somebody so much even though that somebody has other priorities in life and makes me feel like shit all the tym....